Will my Moissanite pass as a diamond?
As a private jeweller I have the privilege of getting to have some great one on one conversations with my clients without either of us having to feel the pressures of the retail store environment. That said, I really wanted to expand off those conversations and write a blog post about the most common concerns that people express during our consults about whether or not to purchase a Moissanite engagement ring.
A big reason why I started this company was so that I could pay my own experience forward of when I was hunting for my dream engagement ring, and to educate others on the wonder that is Moissanite :) Trust me when I say that if there is a blog post out there about Moissanite- I’ve probably read it, and if there is a doubt lingering around in your mind about these stones- I’ve had it. That said, ultimately my primary goal in running my business and in being a spokesperson for all things Moissanite, is to help end the stigma surrounding the need to get engaged via the purchase of an item that the majority of people simply cannot afford.
Say you’re the kind of person who really wants a diamond engagement ring:
No seriously… think long and hard about it and then answer that question out loud to yourself right now. What did you come up with?
Because they are pretty!
Because they sparkle!
Because they are strong and will last forever!
All of the above are correct and definitely legitimate reasons to like diamonds but at least for me, that’s where my list ends. So if you can afford to buy a diamond then by all means get one! But what about those of us who can't? In a perfect world we would all just be out there buying whatever ring we think is the most beautiful to us, but for some reason most people still feel that societal pressure to buy a diamond, which is probably the exact reason why you are reading this article...
Now, let’s pretend diamonds don’t exist. Now what? Now how do we get engaged and symbolize to the world that you intend to marry the person you love? Assuming we are sticking with the whole gemstone on a ring trend- in walks Moissanite.
Are Moissanites pretty?
Do Moissanites sparkle?
Are Moissanites strong and will they last forever?
The answer to all those questions is yes, yes, and yes.
So what’s the problem? Why isn’t EVERYONE buying Moissanite?! In my opinion, and based off all of the information I've gathered from meeting with potential clients, the answer lies in the fact that people are literally afraid of what others will think of them if they DON’T buy a diamond.
Now let’s think about that for another moment. Why on earth is that something to be afraid of? I'll tell you why- because judgement is a terrifying experience. So that said, because the majority of us genuinely do fear being judged, it leaves us all vulnerable to these large powerful corporations who can use that fear to exploit us into buying their product(s).
Have a quick read at this excerpt from Wikipedia about the modern day popularization of the diamond engagement ring: (source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Engagement_ring)
"In 1938, the diamond cartel De Beers began a marketing campaign that would have a major impact on engagement rings. During the Great Depression of the 1930s, the price of diamonds collapsed. At the same time, market research indicated that engagement rings were going out of style with the younger generation. While the first phase of the marketing campaign consisted of market research, the advertising phase began in 1939. One of the first elements of this campaign was to educate the public about the 4 Cs (cut, carats, color, and clarity). In 1947 the slogan "a diamond is forever" was introduced. Ultimately, the De Beers campaign sought to persuade the consumer that an engagement ring is indispensable, and that a diamond is the only acceptable stone for an engagement ring."
And by golly did they ever succeed.
So, that said, if you don’t have a rational reason for wanting a diamond- that is because you have been brainwashed and trained to want one. If you are worried about what your family and your friends will think about you if you don’t buy your significant other a diamond, that is because your family and your friends have all been brainwashed too. Why should anyone care about what kind of a ring you decide to give someone as a symbol of your love for them? Because De Beers and other diamond companies out there have spent millions and millions of dollars to make sure that you care. But, until these diamond companies find a way to make their products more cost efficient for the general public, they are only going to continue to lose more and more customers to alternatives out there like my dear friend Moissanite.
What I can certainly appreciate, is the fact that it is still very reasonable to say that you prefer the look of a diamond to that of other gemstones. However, if that's the case then why not go ahead and buy a cubic zirconium? Those are very diamond like as well! The answer and reason why Moissanite in particular is making such big headlines these days vs other alternatives out there is because aside from the fact that they look just like diamonds, they also happen to be the second strongest gemstone on earth meaning that they will also last forever (while a CZ will not). It is because of those two reasons alone that the move from diamond to Moissanite is a pretty justifiable one to make for those who genuinely do love the look of a diamond, but simply cannot afford to buy one. Baby steps.
Pretty much, if you know that your parents are going to judge you if you don’t propose with a diamond, then shame on your parents. But to be honest I find it hard to believe that anybody's parent's would prefer their child put themselves in financial turmoil over such a silly thing. Try talking to your parents about diamond alternatives and you just might be surprised at the response that you get. I told my parents about it and now my Mother is the proud owner of a whopping 3 carat Moissanite engagement ring upgrade that she LOVES and wears with pride. A dream ring come true :)
If you are worried about what your friends are going to think if you don’t buy a diamond, then shame on your friends. How dare they judge your financial decisions and personal priorities. Might be time to get new friends.
To end off- I realize that the title of this article was never really answered and I hope everyone reading this realizes that this was done on purpose. The point of this article is to get people to stop asking this question all together rather then continue to hide being an ancient nonsensical tradition. The first step to overcoming a stigma is by talking openly about it. The more these conversations are put out there into the world the more normalized it becomes and the less power it has. I truly believe that we are only a few years away from diamond alternative engagement rings being just as common if not more common than diamond ones. But the more we hide, the more we pretend, the more we lie to ourselves and others- the longer it will take for change to take place. So if you want to pass your ring off as a diamond then that's completely understandable- we may not be fully there yet as a society and that's not your fault. BUT if you think you are up for the challenge of being a trailblazer, together we can start spreading the word about the amazingness that is Moissanite so that it can eventually become a totally normal thing for everyone to have, instead of keeping it our pretty little secret.